Brokenness Before Fruit

“I just want to love God and I want to be a Christian! I really want to see Jesus one day.” The true longing in my son’s voice for the Lord was undeniable, and I knew God was at work in his heart. Hearing those words flow from his mouth was an answer to our many prayers that began before he was born. We have always tread very carefully with salvation when it comes to our children because we want it to be a true act of what God is doing, not merely trying to please Mom and Dad.

The biggest thing that we wanted to see in his life was fruit and evidence that God was really and truly at work in his life. If I’m being honest, it’s a difficult assessment to make without expecting perfection.  I prayed that God would allow me to have the wisdom and insight to know the difference in looking for fruit verses expecting perfection, because at the end of the day we all fall short and he is a child that’s continuing to learn, grow, and mature.

As I was looking for fruit, I realized that was overlooking a heart of brokenness. Beautiful, healthy plants are pruned first, and often look unattractively stubby. Last week I took time to talk with my son about self-control and controlling his emotions. Later that day I walked into my son’s room, and I found him with tear filled eyes.

I immediately asked what was wrong and he answered, “Mom I’m praying that God will help me with self-control and I want to ask if you will pray that for me, too?” Our conversation earlier in the day had ended, but God’s work was just beginning. Although it was a moment of brokenness, it was in fact a beautiful moment. A broken and contrite heart is exactly what God loves. (Psalm 51:17)

Yes, we look for fruit but often times it is proceeded by a broken branch that will in turn produce beauty in abundance! I thank God that He doesn’t leave us broken, but instead He is steadily working to make us new!